Disclaimer [In no seriousness]: The post is not suitable for people above the age 25. Since it contains funny matter regarding dating and relationships, we advise you to refrain from reading this in order to protect humorous invasion into your personal requirements of seriousness and grace in your spouse.
So you are single and ready to mingle (as they say)! You start looking out and are surprised by the variety of options in this species. Yes, my dear, we are talking about women. Now, you may wonder how to classify them. Well, you may go ahead and choose you own parameters but I’ll give you a detailed analysis why you should go with the one peculiar kind, which is an eating girl. Yes, a female who loves fast food and is always on-the-go to bag an opportunity for it.
1. She’ll never take time in getting ready while going outdoors, which, mind you my friend is a very rare quality of this interesting species. That’s because she is well aware that if you crave for a McD French Fries now, you need it now and not 10 mins later.
2. She’ll never blabber and bore you with all the details about her family and why Sheela aunty bought the saari for 20K which was not even worth 1000 bucks. This is because she knows that if she’ll waste her time chatting with you, you may be the one to have a larger share of the common chicken nuggets serving you both ordered to share.
3. She’ll never expect you to hopelessly fall in love with her cooking, because she knows that a double cheese burst pizza is anytime better than her home-cooked paneer butter masala. So, while you may enjoy her cooking, you don’t have to worry about giving new compliments everyday.
4. She’ll never poke you every now and then to try new eating places in town. This is because she knows that even the latest menu item at the coolest restaurant in city cannot compete with a 10-piece chicken bucket.
5. During a fight, you don’t have to spend much time thinking of ways to lighten her mood and end the fight. You just send a McD breakfast menu over a Sunday morning and the fight is over. Bet me if she doesn’t call you in an hour (of course only after finishing her hashbrown and delicious morning coffee). And this will be vice versa.
6. She’ll never expect expensive gifts from you because she’ll want you to save it and spent it on checking out the new fast-food chain recently opened round the corner while you take her to a fast-food eating spree over the weekend.
7. She’ll never complain about you getting fatter by the day and losing out on your physique. This is because she is already consumed by her best friends’ complaining about her bulging waistline and sagging tummy. So, her motto is ‘Getting Fat Together’, because YOLO.
8. You don’t have to worry about she being choosy and taking her own time to order when you are eating out. This is because if she is a lover of fast-food, she will mostly have her preferences and favorites at every other joint you go. So, you save the pain of handling her multiple cancellations and reorders.
9. She’ll never expect you to linger long after your meal is done and spend romantic moments, stopping you from relaxing in your bed after a sumptuous and wallet-friendly meal. This is because she knows that there are a no. of people in queue waiting to get a seat the same way as her a few days ago, when she spent a total 30mins for her turn to be able to sit and eat at Burger King.
10. You don’t have to worry about ending up with no money by the end of the month because she insisted on going to a posh restaurant. That’s because all she wants from you is go out and have her favorite McGrill burger with her own fries (no sharing fries, mind you!).
Sheela Aunty: Don’t know her? Don’t worry. She is one of those ‘chaar log’ our Indian society cares the most about but don’t know the whereabouts of.
Paneer Butter Masala: Haven’t tasted yet? Blimey! You are at a total loss. It’s a very famous Indian cuisine people crave to eat. (Although I don’t even like the smell of it. Yes, I am a classified weirdo)
YOLO: You Live Only Once. A very smart excuse being used by youngsters these days for all their mischief.